Early morning thoughts of an exhausted wife and mother

I sit here, watching Trevor finally sleep, being completely unable to as now I'm wide awake despite not sleeping enough. Our sweet boy is already a month old and is growing seemingly by the day. I wonder how bad of a sign it is that Gabe and I have both been faceplanting into bed and essentially passing out for over a week now. He began the week helping to clean up after a building demolition and is now out there trying to ensure as little damage as possible is done by the freezing temperatures, snow, and ice we're supposed to get hit by this weekend. He's already been up almost 24 hours and I swear to God this never gets easier to deal with. I brought him more coffee and another bit of food but I can't do anything else. He texts as much as he can but 2 pictures in a day mean he only had 2 breaks in about 20 hours, which is bullshit. He will text me if and when work slows down but considering there's a state of emergency I don't anticipate seeing or hearing from him very much. 😭😭😭 I realize it's selfish to complain that I don't get to see my husband when people could get hurt or worse but God damnit, I miss him. He's fallen all over himself apologizing and I understand he needs to do this; I just never really want him to go. We miss each other like crazy, but it is what it is for now. I took Trevor and Mochi on a walk this afternoon before it started getting properly cold and I must admit there was a strangeness about the sky and the way the quiet of our usually busy street. I need to sleep but I have trouble sleeping without him at this point, and I want to know he made it home safely. I should go lay down and try to sleep; my big man and little man are both going to need me. Good night.