This has been an extremely good day and I would be lying if I said it wasn't because I haven't spoken to Mom since she said that. Gabe and I struggled to leave each other again today, until he absolutely had to go and I can't wait until he gets home. I hope he knows what he means to me and how much I love him. He sent me a picture of what they were working on and I know it's just a little part of what they've been doing. I know he leans on me emotionally and I needed him to lean on and he's been nothing but sweet, loving, patient, and generous. He was a little shocked Mom could say something so cruel and hurtful, without realizing or caring how much her words would hurt me. When I told him what she said he hugged me tightly and said " I'm so sorry, baby. That's cruel and a shitty thing to say to someone who loves you as much as you love her. You don't deserve to be treated like that. You know how much I love you, right?" This time I clung to him, and simply nodded, feeling his warmth and love, and finding immense comfort in them. I'm not ashamed to admit I cried in front of him, despite feeling like I cry a lot in front of him. She's been trying to get in touch with me and I just don't answer; she has the audacity to ask me for things after saying she never wanted me. She remarked that with Gabe and Marc I'm open, talkative, and I spoil them a bit but with her I have to practically be forced to talk or tell her anything. There's a reason for that and she damn well knows it. If I could tell her things without the judgement and disapproval I would, but I can't, so I don't. Marc is one of my absolute best friends and my baby brother and Gabe is the love I had always hoped for but never expected to find; they probably know and understand me better than anyone. We sat in the courtyard of our building and watched the stars last night; it was wonderful and peaceful, which is really what I wanted. I made a sushi bake for dinner and he said he's on his way home. I just want to eat and have a couple of hours with him, that's all I ask. I guess that's it for now.
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